This is Malaysia - What A True Malaysian Should Know

This is Malaysia - What A True Malaysian Should Know - From FWD EMAIL

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR HAIR LOSS:
Ajinomoto

NATIONAL INSTANT FOOD :
Maggi Mee

NATIONAL BREAKFAST :
Nasi Lemak

NATIONAL LUNCH :
Nasi Ayam

NATIONAL SUPPER :
Roti Canai & Teh Tarik

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR BEING LATE:
Traffic Jam

NATIONAL CONDOM:
None. Most Malaysians still feel embarrassed buying
condoms.
So they rushed into a 7-11, hurriedly grab the nearest
pack, any pack, pay and leave before the cashier can
even blink an eye.

NATIONAL FRUIT FOR INDUCING MENSTRUATION :
Pineapple

NATIONAL APHRODISIAC DRINK:
Stout. Many Malaysian men swear by it. But then after
a few pints they start swearing at everything.. ..

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (MEN):
Food Poisoning

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (WOMEN):
Menstrual Pain

NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY WOMEN WHEN REFUSING SEX:
Headache, kids not asleep, maid not asleep,
mother-in-law around, early appointment, food not
digested yet, aircond not cold enough, aircond too
cold, nail polish not dry yet, forgot to take the
pill, sleepy, stomach cramps, period, haven ' t remove
make-up, haven ' t shower, no water supply, going to
watch ' Santa Barbara ', depress, no mood, etc...

NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY MEN WHEN REFUSING SEX:
None. Malaysian men never refuse sex.

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIARRHOEA :
Cap Kaki Tiga. Down one bottle with warm water and you
are all 'dried up'.

NATIONAL CURE FOR HEADACHES:
Panadol. The 'cure for all'. If it fails we have
another secret weapon - Tiger Balm.

NATIONAL CURE FOR NAUSEA :
Moh Fah Kor.

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIZZINESS:
Minyak Angin Cap Kapak.

NATIONAL CAUSE OF DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES):
Happy Hours.

NATIONAL INSTANT CURE FOR DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES):
The sight of a police road block.

NATIONAL RICE COOKER :
NATIONAL Rice Cooker

NATIONAL RUBBISH DUMP:
Anywhere. As long as it is not your house.

NATIONAL MOST MIS-PRONOUNCED NAME:
Carrefour. Sometimes even pronounced as Carry 4!

NATIONAL ANSWER FOR 'WHERE ARE YOU'?
-on the way.

NATIONAL OFFICIAL TIME FOR BEING LATE
-10 minutes



NATIONAL REASON FOR PRICE INCREASE
Petrol naik lagi kawan... semua barang pun kena naik
ler... inclusive chicken meat?



NATIONAL REASON FOR PETROL INCREASE
Still cheaper than other country la....


NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR CAUSING TRAFFIC JAM:
there was accident on the other side of the road.. of
course must slow down and tengok-tengok, kaypoh-kaypoh
lah!



NATIONAL REASON WHEN REJECTING INVITATION :
'I got some work to do la..u all go first la..'



NATIONAL REASON FOR COLLAPSED BUILDINGS & LEAKY
PARLIAMENT ROOFS:
An act of God. Definitely nothing to with greased palms
and poor quality control. Nope, none whatsoever.


NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR IRRESPONSIBLE POLITICAL STATEMENTS:
None. We were misquoted.


NATIONAL MINISTERIAL REASON FOR INCREASING TOLL RATES:
Orang cakap mau naik mesti mau naik lah! Lu ingat ini
jalan saya punya bapak punya kah?!


NATIONAL REASON FOR HAVING BIG ONION DOMES ON TAXPAYER
FUNDED PUBLIC BUILDINGS:
dunno. It's not as if we're anywhere near the middle
east.

NATIONAL REASON FOR SPURNING BAILOUT PACKAGES FROM
FOREIGN CAR COMPANIES:
We're about to unveil another badly designed low budget
car, which, coupled with our notorious customer service
and corporate mismanagement, will see us bankrupt again
within the next 5 years. And so we have absolutely no
need for the Germans and their silly car-making and
market-positioning knowhow, thank you very much.



NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR JUMPING QUEUE (TRAFFIC JAM OR WHAT
EVER QUEUE) :
everybody doing what lah............



NATIONAL EXCUSE NOT PAYING SAMAN ACCORDING TO DUE DATE:
Relax ler... government will give discount one of these
days



NATIONAL EXCUSE TO BRIBE (ANY CONDITION) :
give them minum kopi lar.....